Saw the oncologist on Tuesday. The CMML is stable but I complained about the 24/7 pain on my side. He gave me a new regimin of pills to take, which seem to be working. Told me to see the rheumatologist, which I did on Wednesday. I may have a cracked rib according to the latest CT scan. How did I get that???? The rheumatologist is a good guy and when I saw him, the pain was almost gone - naturally. He ordered an Xray and a BONE SCAN to find out what is happening.
I could have killed the X-ray bitch. I went in with very little pain and came out almost unable to walk. "you have to move this way. Don't move. Sorry for your pain, but you have to turn this way. On your side." I almost went there alone, but Arlene came with me. She had to drive home, I couldn't. The bone scan is next week. Another uncomfortable test
Still constipated, but having minor successes. I know - it's just what you wanted to hear.
Had to sleep on the couch again. The pain from the x-ray bitch didn't stop till the next morning. Had sharp throbbing pains when I tried to sleep in bed.
My son was supposed to come up with the kids on Sunday. 8 people. No fuckin way. I hurt too bad. I told him to pick another weekend. I really wanted to see him and the grandkids, but I didn't want the grandkids to see me the way I am right now. 2 of the grandkids were bringing their girlfriends/boyfriends with them. No fuckin way. I feel bad about it, but that's the way it is. Don't worry kids, I'm not going to croak before you get to see me again.
I've been really bummed out about all this shit. When is it going to stop. I cry when no one is around. I cry when Arlene is around. I just want all this shit to stop happening so I can enjoy the rest of my life, no matter how long, with Arlene. I don't want her to see me in such pain and misery.
UPDATE: I talked to my son again after I published this blog. Since he's driving 400 miles and really wants to see me, I told him to come on up, but don't expect me to be the perfect host.
He's ok with that so I'll put up with the "friends". I feel better about this now.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
I'm sure you'll enjoy seeing everyone, even if you don't feel 100%. Sorry to hear about the X-Ray bitch though.
Matt I am sorry you are going through all this. It sucs! That was just mean of that x-ray person. Sometimes I think they forget humans can only bend so much. I remember having an x-ray once after I fell, I had a torn achilles tendon on one leg and a really hurt leg on the other side and I had to get up on a tall x-ray table. The guy didn't even offer any help at all and I just cried. Sorry for your pain too!
Even though you don't feel good I think it will be good for you to have family around. Let them wait on you and help you, it will make them feel good because they love you. It doesn't make us weak to let people help us...it shows our wisdom. God bless you and Arlene, Barbara
Post a Comment